Bumper Sticker of the Day:

DOGS ARE FAMILY!

You wouldn't chain your grandma outside!

Redemption

"All that is gold does not glitter,
   Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
   Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
   A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be the blade that was broken,
   The crownless again shall be king."

It's in our stories, in our songs,
in our hopes, in our hearts,
in all that makes us human.
And it is also real.
Merry Christmas.

 

Snow Day!

I'm angry with myself. We're not speaking... So, while she gets all of her sulkiness out, I am going to read all day long in my cozy, snow-blanketed house.

Being the first part of The Lord of The Rings

This is my Christmas present to myself this year: before I return to JBU, I will read The Fellowship of The Ring. I’ve tried before, and it didn’t work. This time, I think we are a go. I’m only 81 pages into it. I know I tend toward overexcitement about projects at the beginning, but, seriously, this just might work.

I can’t believe I just grouped this experience with other “projects” I have undertaken. I can’t believe that I start my sentences with cheesy and false phrases like “I can’t believe . . .” Cheesy because I say it all the time, and false because I can believe that I would make a project out of reading. It’s usually what I do.

I need to work on reading for the sake of reading. A less analytical approach toward literature is probably in order.

I see something like Peter Pan, and all I can think is, ‘It’s a commentary on adolescent turmoil.  The protagonist is deeply marked by the internal conflict that comes with aging. This is compounded by his obvious Oedipal tendencies (don’t believe me? He’s enamored with Wendy, who is some sort of mother to him and his Lost Boys. His exploits chiefly involve the maiming of Captain Hook, who is always played by a double-cast actor. His other role? Mr. Darling, the father of the three children taken to Never-Never Land. Significant? I THINK YES). Of course the boy doesn’t want to grow up. Not only is he afraid of the real world, he is afraid of the happenings in his own head. Why DEAL with all of that? Why not remain a boy forever? As he is, he is fixed in time. These conflicts are frozen with him, thereby giving him the option to never face them.’

Or maybe it’s just a play about a boy who can fly.

So, back to Fellowship.

Maybe part of my self-given present should be a promise to not overanalyze this one. Instead, I’ll enter humbly into the world that Tolkien crafted – and a wonderful world it is. It runs on a slower, richer pace than the hyped-up Hollywood slideshow. The movie version is (not surprisingly) sexitized. The fifty-year old Frodo and enormous-eybrowed Gandalf from the book would simply not be allowed…

Yep, definitely analyzing again.

II'm not saying my analyses are accurate. I’m not saying everyone should do this to books. I just will. Always. I enjoy my little pretenses, probably too much.

Someday, I’ll make the effort to erase the pretense and presumption. I’ll read this book to my kids when they’re all tucked up in bed, eyes wide in wonderment. Then, the book will just be a book. A great book. A dense book. Maybe too dense for really small ones… perhaps we’ll start with a different world, like Narnia, or Hogwarts, or even Never-Never Land.

But I’ll leave out all the crap about Oedipus.

Miss Scarlett

Sometimes it's fun to pretend that you're someone else.

Makes you think about who you are in real life.

Finally.

The Honors Orientation final was beautiful.

Everyone in the room said what they had to say. Not what anybody told them to say.

We’re changing. We’re growing. We’re being transformed.

Piece of psycho doodle “poetry” (composed during class):

PERHAPS EVERYONE

Is a               

GENIUS ...

Don’t judge.

Don’t judge.
Don’t ever judge.
Don’t ever ever ever judge.
Don’t ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever
ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever
ever ever ever ever ever

                                                                                                judge.

                                                                                                ever.

                                                                                                                                LISTEN TO THEM.

Listen to the people.       à

listentothepeople.

                                                                you’ll learn more than you ever

                                          thought you could.

You want to see His glory?

Doing Nothing.

I was gifted a copy of The Art of Doing Nothing.

Over break, I will discover nothing. And blog about it.

Perhaps this was not the gifter's intent, but there it is.

New Year's Resolution (ahead of the game!)

My New Year's Resolution is to NEVER GET A PINTREST.






We'll see what happens.

Something I'll Regret Posting

You. You have me up at 2 a.m. blogging when I really should be asleep. Up blogging about things that really shouldn’t matter anymore, things that should have stopped mattering to me about 4 years ago, and yet, I’m still typing.

I only pretended to like The Who. Thought you should know.

The brief obsession with Douglas Adams, on the other hand, was genuine.

I really hate how almost everything I did for a while was in an attempt to impress you. I really hate how much I still try to impress you. I really hate that I felt that way – like I had to impress you. It was like you wanted something from me, something that wasn’t actually me, so I faked it… It was like I was your little dancing monkey or something.

And I’m starting to sound very like that girl who you once told in an email something like, “You’re just a girl. I should have known. Just a girl, like the rest of them. If you’re not, prove me wrong. Don’t send this to all of your friends in the next five minutes. Don’t tell anyone about it at all.”

I just want you to know that I didn’t send it to anyone. I did, however, print it out and made my dad read it because I was distraught. Just so you know - he wasn’t harsh towards you or anything. I really wanted him to be, but he wasn’t.

A couple years after you sent me that email, I showed it to Breonna, and then I BURNED IT IN MY KITCHEN SINK ALONG WITH A PICTURE OF US FROM THAT STUPID DINNER DANCE.

So, yes, you’re absolutely right, I am “Just a girl, like the rest of them.”

And I’m still trying to impress you.

And failing.

I skip every Jack Johnson song on Pandora. I love salad dressing. I always have. I always will. I always use more of it than I should.

 I care. I care about you. I still care about you, and I’m going to keep caring about you. I can’t stop caring about you. I don’t know why. I’m not going to try to untangle my motives. I just care. I care.

And you decided I was good enough for a few weeks at the beginning of this semester and then, apparently, I wasn’t good enough anymore. I wasn’t impressive enough anymore. I hadn’t earned the right of your royal attention anymore.

And that probably isn’t what happened, but it still feels like it. And I’m going to blog out my feelings in this immature manner because, as you once so astutely observed, I am “just a girl.”

Maybe you’ll read this someday, you have the URL somewhere. The worst part is that I want you to.

Oh!

I want out. I want out of my mindset, of my opinions, of my prejudices.

The hero that was supposed to rescue me can flit and fade across the movie screen, in all his brawn and bravado, brandishing his weapons.

There are other sorts of heroes - 

The sorts of heroes that understand that sanity is weakness and madness is strength. They have dreams, and they rebuild temples; their ideals are loftier than the mountains which they foolishly attempt to climb… They try to remind me that the fruits in the apple cart are not apples but oranges, and the apple cart should probably be blown to smithereens instead of merely “upset.”

The world does not understand, and will always undermine, the kingdom from which these heroes come. The world kills them, because they simply cannot exist here – they do not belong.

And always, always, the unyielding faithfulness and grace of God will exist to save us – but never in the way that we predict, never in the way that we could readily accept.

The grace of God comes out of nowhere. The grace of God hurtles past us, mounted upon a ragged horse, shouting battle cries at windmills. The grace of God is a thirty-something whack job from Nowheresville, Israel, who says that life is death and death is life. The grace of God is for those who are foolish enough to forget what’s impossible and embrace what is.

(blogging to get angst out of my system. J-me, you don't have to read this)

I turned in four papers today...

I don't think I did as well on them as I could have...

I say Evangelicals should pursue the life of the mind... and I don't do it myself...

ANGST ANGST ANGST / HYPOCRISY HYPOCRISY HYPOCRISY/ PRIDE PRIDE PRIDE.

Whooo. Ok, off to Walker's Christmas party.

Mark Noll

Prompted: Do you agree with Noll’s perceptions on the evangelical mind in the United States of America today? Pick a side – either Noll’s or the churches – and passionately defend it (do not provide middle ground or valid points for both sides; pick one stance and defend why you agree – convince me!).

“Unlike their spiritual ancestors, modern evangelicals have not pursued comprehensive thinking under God or sought a mind shaped to its furthest reaches by Christian perspectives.”

                                                                                                                                                ~Mark Noll

He’s right.

Where to start this rant… hmmmmm…

Noll starts his book by acknowledging that the modern Evangelical Church has had “dynamic success at a popular level.” And it has. But, despite this (or perhaps because of it) the modern Evangelical Church is not exactly known as a great institution of thought…

Quite the opposite.

All I really have to draw from on this topic is my own experience with the modern Evangelical Church. Here’s my spin on the facts, whatever they might be:

The literature with the “Evangelical Church” label is penned by Francine Rivers, Ted Dekker, Jerry B. Jenkins, and the like. Or it has “Chicken Soup” in the title. This is bad.

“Evangelical Church” politics seem to involve yelling. And arrogance. And television. And a moral obligation to vote Republican. This is bad.

“Evangelical Church” conferences need lights, and popular music groups, and lots of crying. This is bad.

The “Evangelical Church” teen-girl Bible study means ice cream and purity talks. This is bad.

I grew up in “Evangelical Church.” I have never read the entire Bible. This is bad.

When Noll was talking about approaching other subjects besides theology in a distinctly “Evangelical” manner, I grasped for something comparable. How do you study economics in a “Christian” way? How do you study anthropology in a “Christian” way? You can certainly do it in a “secular” way… that seems to be the only way anyone does it these days.

But is there a “Christian” way? Or is Richard Hofstadter right when he says, “In fact, learning and cultivation appear to be handicaps in the propagation of faith”?

Well, as long as the Evangelical Church keeps feeding itself intellectual Ramen, who’s going to prove him wrong?

So, here's the deal...

Working on this "The Scandal of the Evangelical Mind" chapter... I should probably come up with an intelligent response to this. I will... in the morning...

All I have right now is, "YOU GO MARK NOLL. YOU GO!"

Yep.

G'night.