Gold Stars

(I was prompted to look at an alternative approach to education and consider the differences between it and JBU/ throw my own life in there somehow. Life is funny, and I just happened to have this little freak out this morning that pertained to the prompt… so I rambled a little longer than normal)

At about 10 a.m., 10/26/11

I am freaking out right now. I am freaking out because I have half of a research paper left to write for my Lit. class by tomorrow and about 30 more pages of Confessions to understand before Western Civ. I am having trouble with Augustine… probably because I’m trying to read it so quickly, but it doesn’t matter, it MUST be done, and it must be done soon. Oh, how glad I will be when this week is over.

Why am I freaking out? Well, because if I don’t understand and read all of Augustine, Dr. Moore will give us one of those in-class reflection questions, and I won’t do well on it, and it will affect my grade… and if I don’t finish that paper, and finish it well, I’ll get a bad grade, which will affect my grade, and GPA, and job/family/happy life in suburbia….

GOSH I WISH THOSE STUPID BELLS WOULD STOP RINGING, I CAN’T CONCENTRATE! Don’t they UNDERSTAND that I am TRYING to get GOOD GRADES HERE!!!!!!!!

Oh, why do I always wait until the last minute to do these sorts of things? It makes everything feel so meaningless. I weary of working for the little gold star stickers (at least the figurative ones, real gold star stickers would be AWESOME), they are never enough, anyway… I think I want understanding for the sake of understanding, but I’ve been hardwired to get straight A’s. After all, is there a difference?

About 12 hours later

So, what this blog was actually supposed to be about:

I thought about going to St. John’s College. I like books, and I like the idea of learning by studying and discussing books, but I was pretty much scared away from the college by the tuition.

The real appeal of St. John’s lies in this: the abandonment of grades and the embracing of the great books leads to a fuller understanding of the intrinsic value of knowledge. The motivation to learn does not have to be divided between the desire for good grades and the desire for understanding. Also, the students have more frequent access to the source of the knowledge found in textbooks. It’s not that I would really want to study calculus out of Newton’s Principia, but there is something freeing about it. The idea sort of tickles my romantic fancy.

I’m not saying that the students at St. John’s have completely pure (understanding for the sake of understanding) motives. Most of them are planning on some profession, and some of them must use what they learn for appearances sake (then again, who doesn’t).

Since JBU does give grades, grades will always be a potential motivator for students. So does that mean we eliminate grades? Do we eliminate the factor that has placed me above my peers and told me who I am? Heck yes. Or, maybe I should just eliminate the grades from my own mind… hmmmm…